Ada

"outside your window, the world is gone to war/are you the one I've been waiting for?

today is the most important day of my life so far, the culmination of all I’ve done, accomplished, missed, achieved, almost-achieved, dreamt, lost, gained, regained, and remained.

today is the day I truly understood the meaning of unconditional love as a practice, not as mere words.

today is when my life truly began, the realisation of all the potential love I have always had within me.

today is when all I have known to be truth was finally revealed and the trumpets have sung and their tune is incredibly beautiful and beyond comprehension. I hold you into my arms, a love letter I’ve finally written, the culmination of all the love loved by all teenagers to have ever existed; the truth hidden inside every cliché; the book of love has always been open, I just now have learned how to read.

Ada Ada Ada

it’s all for you from now on and it has always been your name echoes inside of me with the strength of all the waves ever to have risen and to have crashed again and again and again and it shall do until the day I die. I love you as I never loved anyone else.

Not even myself.

I hold you in my arms and I think of all that has gone into my life and into your mother’s life and into the lives of all the people that have came before us until the very moment at 04:07 in the morning when I see you and you are crying because you have taken your first breath. it hurts. but then there is comfort and I cut your navel string and there you are; no longer ours, but also belonging to the world. there’s no much meaning in life aside from what we ascribe to it. you are the meaning.

Ada min lilla Ada min älskade Ada minha pequena minha preciosa minha filha.